Domestic violence is a serious problem.
About 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been victims of (some form of) physical violence by an intimate partner within their lifetime. That’s a very serious and tough problem. It isn’t something to be ignored. Recently, an Imgur user, krissykross created a post with images detailing the time she spent with her abusive partner, Adam.
She says that that is a good example of the strings of texts she would get at work while on shift. She doesn’t reply immediately because she is not allowed her phone on the clock.
Tony was her coworker. He clocked off when she was clocking on. Tony helped her change her tire once, and Adam accused her of sleeping with him.
She stayed the night with a female friend from work. He knew because he “set traps” for her.
Adam was her husband. This is how her husband treated her.
She said she visits her mother once every couple years. At the time of the text, she had a huge bruise on her arm from where her husband had bit her, leaving visible teeth marks. She said that the bruise was so bad that it hung around for almost a month. It lasted long enough through her visit to her mother and to be photographed by the NCIS when she finally called them.
She goes on to explain;
As for the midnight thing, I had to call him at midnight every night I was with my mother. Assuming it was because he wanted to make sure I wasn’t out being drunk and doing nefarious things during the evening.
My ex-husband was a kind, loving man. That is, until I lost weight (at 5’3″ and over 200lbs, it was sort of necessary.) I then got a job. Suddenly, I was cheating, I lost weight to get men, I couldn’t buy clothes that fit me after the 80 pounds lost because it showed off my body.
He hit me and sexuallly assaulted me. He waited outside my work for whole shifts, not telling me if he was carrying the Beretta M9 he had purchased recently. I wanted to go out with two (female) coworkers for my 23rd birthday, I told him weeks in advance and when the time came, he punched me in the face and slammed my head into the floor, only leaving me alone because he had duty that evening. I tired to go to the police in the middle of the night, he tailgated me the whole way, I tried to talk to his parents and they told me it was normal in a young marriage and I should reassure him. His father is a pastor in Tennessee and holds this belief.
It’s not easy for a victim to leave their abusive partner. But I’m glad that Krissykross found it in herself to do so.
I finally got the guts to leave when he hurt my dog and kitten. While he was at work, I packed a bag, my pets, and their food, and hid at a coworker’s house and called NCIS and the police. I spent hours getting bruises photographed, giving my statement, waiting while they put him on restriction. I saw him only a handful of times after, all in court. 3 court dates to get a PO approved, the divorce hearing where he told me if I dropped the charges, he’d support me financially, and the two military court dates.
He was charged with a handful of misdemeanors and two felonies. I accepted his guilty plea bargain for 8 months in the Miramar brig on the condition that the felony charges be dropped. The judge wanted to give him 10. I still had to listen to several people testify how great of a person he was- a whole group on his side while I sat there with one friend and my lawyer.
She ends on a very sweet note.
3 years later and i’m actually doing great. I have my own place, a decent job, my pets are doing very well. My credit is shit from the divorce, but really, I’m in decent company in that. This isn’t really a sob story; I’m really proud of what I’ve done on my own. I just wanted to share for possibly some closure since I never really got that. Strangers on the internet are better than keeping it inside for so long. And if you hate my story, I just lose some fake points anyway. I save these text messages to remind myself how far I’ve come, not to cry over. I’m still terrible in relationships but…
I’m good enough, I’m smart enough. And gosh darn it, people like me.